I really really really can't live like this anymore... its just so fucking hard.
Its like every passing day is a constant reminder of how miserable I have become.
Its like one day everything is fine and then you grow up and it all goes to shit.
Why is being who you are so horrible?
Its not like I've committed a crime or become an out of control drug addict/alcoholic.
so today as soon as I got home there of course was a note for me which read:
"
Jacquelyn
As soon as you see this call me. We are now going back on chores and if you don't do something one time you have no more chances you will start paying rent. You wanna be tough and run away well now you can take the responsibilities that go along with it. am not helping you out anymore you are on your own to pay bills and manage your own priorities. Don't think I am helping you with your taxes, figure it out on your own or go to H&R block. I set you up for a date on Sunday with a woman I work with son his name is James. You better go and be nice to him. Empty the dishwasher and fill it. Dust and vacuum. Oh and the cat threw up on your bed again you better clean that up.
Mom"
Real nice ..this is why I don't want to be home!
You would think Ive done some horrible thing but no I just asked her to accept who I am. On top of this Nicole with the phone calls, text, and IM's all day... She goes in the one text I know you went home and you're passing by stop by my bed is empty (I ignored all the calls text and IMs) ..WTF is there like no way I can have a normal relationship with someone who isn't a total fuckwad? Am I that horrible that no one wants to be with me? Seriously whats wrong with me? Perhaps I just have this inate ability to turn every human being I meet off wihout knowing it. There must be something wrong with my personality ... or maybe I'm just that nasty looking that noone wants to be with me ...
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ok.. i am officially disgusted, and i haven't even finished reading.. i just lost it at "I set you up for a date on Sunday with a woman I work with son his name is James. You better go and be nice to him." that is some unholy fucked up fucking shit right there... seriously don't let me anywhere near that CUNT! i will fuck her shit up! ok.. i am gonna keep reading now.. "oh and the cat threw up on your bed again" what the fuck? wow.. she is seriously a piece of shit! i hate her as much as you do. i really really really do. honey, if i was there.. you don't even know.. i would first instill my wrath upon her.. and i would clean the cat puke up for you, no one deserves to come home to cat puke on their bed.
ReplyDeleteOn the note of Nicole, fuck that bitch, someone needs to fuck her sideways.. she is fucking stupid, you are a beautiful person inside and out, and i mean that, i swear to you i am not just saying that!!! you know what a ridiculous blunt bitch i am, if you were an ugly bitch i would tell you, you were. and you aren't. you are nothing but loved here, and i see you for who you truly are, as does john and michael, you are always welcome here. no matter where you are in life. you are a smart, caring, compassionate, patient, loving, wonderful person, i cherish you and our friendship each and every day. with out you i would have lost it. i swear! don't ever doubt yourself. you are much better than what these morons see you as. much better.
I will start off by saying, "I will unleash my wrath against your mom, if you do, Crystal." It's so ridiculous that she doesn't see you doing chores in the first place without being told.
ReplyDeleteJust threaten Nicole that you'll call the police on her, and if she doesn't stop, then actually "do" it.
Sunday. Haha. Even though we're not going on a date, say that you are meeting up with another boy that day. That is, if you still want to "keep those plans."
And Jackie, if I didn't like you; if I hated your guts, then I wouldn't have come to KOP with you. You're are one of the most, caring, compassionate people I know. Don't let a couple bad light bulbs make you think that you can't get anyone. In acting, most actors never get their first gig until after a few hundred auditions. Thomas Edison failed "thousands" of times before getting the lightbulb to work. There's someone out there for you, and if they don't want to be your friend, then it's "their" loss, not "yours."
Jackie, you're a great person, and I am proud to say that you're my friend.
I can hardly believe someone would say that to someone. Nonetheless an actual mother. But, all I can honestly say is, keep your head up while dealing with something like this, because no matter how hard it is, you'll get through it. I'm here to talk if you need someone.
ReplyDelete&; Kash
Wow.. wtf. First of all, I'm lost as to why you are even back there? I thought you were going on a trip or something. So I am totally missing something here. But! That's fucked up your mom is still setting you up with guys. Tell her to shove it. Especially now that she's no longer even being nice to you.. and treating you..yeah.
ReplyDeleteGrr....